asexual dysphoria waltz

Disrupted Cannon, Colleen Simmons

i wanted to be a slow dancer. then

i wanted not to move my body at all. not even 

a ghost in upbeat funeral dirge should come

this close. once, when i ascertained the formula,

i danced with arced & straight body. i blessed god

for allowing my tongue to skirt along ridges of anonymity.

you are told how to jive at an age when being a man is 

more than holding a spear of skin, to marry hand to waist.

more than to unknow myself, unlearn my name. 

what god can fuck the unfuck out of me? 

what azúcar or solvent builds a mecca in

the genitals when no song separates you 

from being held? the church of a navel chimes

with some lonesome moonlight. the grease of memory

bore a child i yearned in me. she would be able to love 

fruit, taste the peels of bedsheets, keep tempo with eyes. 

i want to wrench out the womb i was not given,

drape it over the dance hall lights, & leave again.

About the Author

Liam Strong · Northwestern Michigan College

Liam Strong is a Pushcart Prize nominated queer writer and currently studies Writing at University of Wisconsin-Superior. They are the former editor of NMC Magazine. You can find their works in Impossible Archetype, Dunes Review, Monday Night, Lunch Ticket, Chiron Review, The Maynard, Panoply, Prairie Margins, and The 3288 Review. “asexual dysphoria waltz” first appeared in NMC Magazine.

About the Artist

Colleen Simmons

Colleen Simmons is a 23 year old ceramist and illustrator drawn to faces and the human form.  These inspirations from the body manifest in her two-dimensional and three-dimensional work, where she finds surprising similarities in form. The curvy lines, circles, and soft edges she gravitates towards in her paintings and drawings translate into her ceramics work with dreamlike results. “Disrupted Cannon” first appeared in Collision.

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